Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Dialysis went smooth today. The guy that sits next to me is 80 and moving to Newport Beach, California. This was his last day here.
I'm still thinking about what Dr. Strauss talked about. I have to call and talk with the transplant doctors. Today I looked over more statistics about lung transplants and confirmed what Dr. Strauss talked about. 50% of the people that get lung transplants in the age range of 50s will die within five years. I guess 50% live, but how long? I'm planning on living longer than five years so I still have to think about all this.
I have to learn to just take it easy. I need to do the nebulizer every six hours, no matter where I am or what I'm doing.
I used my scooter today to go to the store on the corner. It makes getting around so much easier. I could never walk to that store and back home. It takes a while getting used to scooting around, Just with the people that look at you.
Oxygen man was here today filling up my tank for the weekend. Santo was here cleaning and helped with my laundry. I'm ready for the weekend.
Dialysis went smooth today. The guy that sits next to me is 80 and moving to Newport Beach, California. This was his last day here.
I'm still thinking about what Dr. Strauss talked about. I have to call and talk with the transplant doctors. Today I looked over more statistics about lung transplants and confirmed what Dr. Strauss talked about. 50% of the people that get lung transplants in the age range of 50s will die within five years. I guess 50% live, but how long? I'm planning on living longer than five years so I still have to think about all this.
I have to learn to just take it easy. I need to do the nebulizer every six hours, no matter where I am or what I'm doing.
I used my scooter today to go to the store on the corner. It makes getting around so much easier. I could never walk to that store and back home. It takes a while getting used to scooting around, Just with the people that look at you.
Oxygen man was here today filling up my tank for the weekend. Santo was here cleaning and helped with my laundry. I'm ready for the weekend.

Tuesday, November 29, 2005

I have a small fiber optic Christmas tree and I asked my sister Rosemarie to send me over a few Christmas balls for the tree. She sent me over 4 balls and a Christmas cup. Of the four balls, Three of them were broken. They didn't have hooks on them so I couldn't hang them. Then she send me one that had string to hang it on the tree. She also send a candy cane. All this was in a Duncan Donut box. I have my tree up already. I like starting Christmas early.
I just talked with Dr. Struass, my Pulmonary doctor at the East Orange VA Hospital. He read the statistics for Lung Transplants to me. 50 to 60 % die within five years of the operation. Do I feel like I'll be alive in 5 years if I don't get a Lung Transplant? Yes! I do. If I do, then maybe I shouldn't have a transplant. I have to give this all serious thought. Plus, I'm looking to get a Kidney and a Lung. Dr. Strauss suggested that I talk directly to a Lung Transplant doctor because only they know for sure. I have been having nightmares about this so maybe I'm just getting cold feet. I'll give it more thought and research. I'm doing this because I want to live, not because I want to take a chance. No doctors have told me that I only have two years to live. If that was the case, then I wouldn't give it a second thought. I have a lot to think about tonight. Dr. Strauss also suggested I go to University of Penn in Philadelphia and he gave me the telephone number to call them but he said it's all up to me. I kind of wish someone would make the decisions for me. But I will.
I have a noduel on my left lung. I have to have another catscan in February and another appointment with Dr. Kerr, a pulmonary doctor here in Brick. Today I have to call Dr. Strauss at the VA and ask him about the Lung Transplant. I have to get this moving and it's up to me to keep it moving. I don't want to to happen what happened in the VA and my kidney transplant. I thought things were happening but they weren't. I talked with Columbia Presby Hospital in New York but it's up to a doctor to call them and make the referral and fill out the paperwork. They do a lot of checking, including checking to make sure you can pay for the transplant.
Mickey, my nephew, is going to take me shopping today. He just arrived so I'll shower and get ready. I want to go early while I have energy. I need some food, water and juice. I also want to buy a couple Christmas gifts.

Sunday, November 27, 2005

The most important thing about having COPD as well as dialysis is learning to manage the diseases. The other day I had my nephew go out to the trunk of my car and get my concentrator. It's a big machine that turns regular air into pure oxygen for me. He asked me why I carry it around with me. I said "If you want to breath you do what you have to do, It's all about staying alive". I have to carry a lot of things with me because I have to be prepared for whatever can go wrong and things go wrong all the time. I can catch them if I have the right medications with me. I also carry a list of all my medications in case I have to call 911 and I can't talk to them. They always need a copy of all your medications and your doctors and they have to know about dialysis. They can't take blood pressure in my dialysis arm (Left arm) where I have my fistula. Hopefully they will read the letter and the instructions. I also can't get needles in that arm. So, I try to be always prepared and if you're prepared then chances are nothing will happen. It's when you're not prepared when things happen.

Saturday, November 26, 2005

I spent today sleeping. My niece, Marybeth, came over and made me lunch and baked me a cake. She even straightened up my place for me a little. She was so nice. I was sweating and couldn't get out of bed but I was very hungry. Then after she left I slept. After a while Mickey came over with a roast beef dinner and some grapes. I sent him to store to buy me some cherries, an couple oranges and a banana. He didn't have my ShopRite card so everything was very expensive. You know how those cards are: Grapes 7.99 but with card 2.99. They get you coming and going at that place. All to monitor your shopping habits.
I'm feeling better now. I just had dinner. I have to watch my water drinking and apple juice drinking.
I'm going to go back to sleep and rest some more. I have 7 days of antibiotics and I'm only on day 2. They are pretty strong and the first one knocked me out. I wonder if the others will do the same thing.
Thanksgiving is over and it was a lot of fun, even though I got a little sick towards the end. I just get tired and then have a little trouble breathing. The following day I went to the doctor and got some antibiotics and today I'm starting to feel much better. I don't know what's wrong with me, I couldn't even eat on Thanksgiving.
We had a great time though. This was the first time that Caroline and he band of Gypsies came to dinner. You can't just invite Caroline. She's a little like a rock star because along with her comes her entourage. It just grew from Caroline and Michael; then we realized that Victoria would be alone so we invited her. They we found out that her mother was on her way back to Sweden so we invited her. I kept calling Denise, whose house we were eating and and she didn't mind each time I said "one more person". Fortunately, my family cooks for an Army all the time so even with 20 people we still had loads of left overs. Everyone called me after dinner and said what a great time they had and all the kids had a good time, so that was nice.
I think Denise was thrown a little in the beginining because she walked in to her house and it was a full house already.
Towards the end of the dinner, I don't know what it is but I think I get excited and a little tired but I can't eat but I want to. I just can't get myself to eat. After when I get home, I can eat when I'm alone. But I have trouble eating with people. What is this a new phobia? Don't I have enough phobias?
Well, the doctor said that this antibiotic, Factive (350mg), should do the job. He said it's a very strong antibiotic. After one day I noticed the difference. I have 7 days of this pill. Thanks goodness for insurance, this antibiotic is almost $200.00 for 7 little pills.

Thursday, November 24, 2005

It's Thanksgiving and I'm looking forward to dinner already and it's only 5:00AM. I made sausage stuffing pies as my contribution. It's the way my mother used to make the stuffing. I'm sure it's not as good as hers but I tried.
Caroline and Michael are coming in from New York for the dinner and I think Evan McDaniel and Nick's girl friend, Victoria is coming too. It's going to be a fun Thanksgiving. There will be around 20 of us for dinner. Denise is cooking up a storm. Victoria's mother is coming too and she'll have to get to the airport at 10:00PM.
It's looks like snow today.

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

My sister, Rosemarie, always sends me the best things to eat but sometimes she forgets that I can’t eat something and she sends it over. I can’t eat salt and she sent me over salted nuts. I had to have a couple because I love them but I had to give the rest away to Santo. Then, I really can’t eat chocolate so she sent me over chocolate covered salted pretzels. A double wammy. I didn’t even open these. I’ll regift as soon as I can figure out who I can give them to. Maybe I can bring them to Thanksgiving dinner and the kids will eat them.
It’s the day before Thanksgiving. I’m going to make my sausage stuffing today so it’s all ready for tomorrow.
Last night I had a dream that all my dreams came true. I woke up so happy, I was smiling. What a great dream that was.
My fish, Twizzle, is swimming around and seems very happy. I’m going to clean his bowl today and I hope I don’t kill him.
I’m still getting stuff I bought on eBay and getting notices of things that I didn’t win. Every time I get a “You didn’t win the auction”. I’m happy.
It’s supposed to snow tonight and Michael is coming in from Los Angeles. I hope his flight isn’t delayed because he arrives tomorrow morning at 5AM.
The news just said “Is Michael Jackson taking jabs at Jews?” Now they have tapes of Michael asking someone on tape for seven million dollars. Why doesn’t this guy just fade in the night? We’ve had enough of him.

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

I have to buy some new pants. All my pants are so big for me. I know baggy is in but I don't think that goes when your in your 50s. I'm looking like a gang banger/ rapper that won't let go of his youth. All I need is to wear my hat to the side. I've lost so much weight that my waist must be around 30 inches now. It used to be around 36 so all my pants fall off me and that's another look that is in but again, not when you're in your 50s. I don't think there are too many people that want to see my underwear or half of my ass hanging out of my pants as I walk around with oxygen.
My fish, Twizzel, hasn't eaten any of his food. I hope I don't have a picky fish. Tomorrow I'll clean the tank and give him more food. It's up to him if he wants to live. I think he's got it made. All he does is swim around in this really nice bowl and I give him something to eat and change his water once a week. I wanted a pet but the fish really doesn't give you much feed back. I tap on the glass and he doesn't even notice me.
All the sales are starting. I saw an add for PreThanksgiving Sale starting before Thanksgiving. They can't wait to get our money. Everything this year is for sale. All the stuff we don't need. Get ready to spend money on gifts. I love Christmas and I love buying gifts so I have to be careful not to build my credit cards up and up. I just got them down and even cancelled a couple. I already started buying gifts. My biggest problem is buying myself stuff when I'm out shopping. My mother always said to me "If you want something, buy it for yourself because no body is ever going to buy you exactly what you want." so when I see something I really like, I'm very tempted to buy it.
My nephew, Mickey, came by and dropped off some things for me to eat. My sister, Rosemarie, made me one of those Cornish hens. She knows I love them. They are so small I can eat and whole one for dinner.
My fish, Twizzler, is still living. It’s been four days and that’s the longest I’ve ever been able to keep a fish alive. He seems happy. I’ll clean his tank tomorrow, or have Santo do it.
I’m trying to stay away from watching TV. It’s the same old stuff. Should be getting out of Iraq? Should we stay? Was there WMDs? Should we rebuild New Orleans? Are we getting another storm? Will it snow? Will terrorists bomb New York? Where will they hit next? Are airports safe? It’s all about fear. Everything is supposed to make us fear everything and everyone.
I was in Pathmark (a supermarket) yesterday and I’m riding around on a scooter. A little kid waved to me and I waved back but you have to be careful today. You can’t even wave to a little kid. You almost have to look the other way.
That teacher that had sex with her student doesn’t even have to spend a day in jail. If that was a male teacher then you can be sure the guy would be in jail for twenty years. I don’t understand that. The justice is different if you’re a beautiful girl. She’s very lucky.
It’s raining today and we’re getting another storm tomorrow.
My friend Greg Bradford emailed me. He didn’t hear from me and thought I was gone. I emailed him that I’m still alive. It was my fault. He emailed me a couple times and I didn’t reply right away. I’ve had this bacterial infection and I’ve been sleeping and sleeping. I’m starting to feel better now.

Monday, November 21, 2005

I just talked with Dr. Shulman. He's a lung transplant doctor over at Columbia Presby Hospital in NYC. I was referred to him by a friend, Dr. Jack Maidman. Dr. Shulman said that it is very unusual to need a Lung and a kidney. It's also odd to have FSGS as my kidney disease. I know that's true. Dr. Shulman is putting me in touch with the Dr. Sonnett's office. He's the surgeon for Lung Transplants. Now my doctor has to fill out the paperwork and they have to check on me to see that I can do everything but health wise and financially. They said this process takes about 7 weeks. I'm used to waiting. I told them that if I had to make a choice I would want a Lung first.
I went shopping today so that I can make stuffing for Thanksgiving. The Shoprite was so packed I got tired. I had to come home after shopping and sleep. I still have all the stuff I bought in the trunk of the car. When I left Shoprite I had someone from the store help me bring my stuff and put it in my car.
When I got home I had to give myself a treatment down in the lobby. That portable nebulizer has helped me so much. Everyone should have one that needs a nebulizer.
Oh, I bought fish food for my new friend. I have to get it and give it to the fish before he dies. The fish is one of those killer fish. The kind that can't have any friends. He swims all alone in the bowl. If I got a fish friend for him he'd kill it.
I'm starting to fell a little better now. I'm waiting for my house cleaner to come so I can send him down to get my stuff from the car. I hope he comes soon so my milk doesn't go bad.
Imagine a lung and a kidney transplant. God will really have to watch over me. That's some miracle.

Sunday, November 20, 2005

I was just cruising on my remote control and couldn't help but notice Joan Rivers. Have you seen her face? How can someone do that? She's like Michael Jackson. Can you imagine what she looks like in the morning. I'm sure it's very scary but that doesn't stop her from selling that jewelry on TV. She's plugging away and doing everything she can to get the viewers to buy that junk. I feel sorry for the old people that sit home and buy this stuff. I love when they call in and they sellers pretend that they care about them. They should just do one where they call the person a fool, and ask them, "Why would you buy a piece of junk like this, would by anything from Joan Rivers?".
Just got back from dialysis. It's Sunday and we're on a Thanksgiving schedule so I'll have dialysis on Tuesday and then again on Friday. That will give me off on Wednesday and Thanksgiving. Caroline is coming over with Michael for Thanksgiving. That's going to be fun. We'll be having Thanksgiving at Denise's house with about 20 people. I'm looking forward to it. I'm still recovering from my birthday party. I had to sleep a little while after dialysis. I did the strangest thing this morning. I left for dialysis without my oxygen. I got picked up by the driver and we made it all the way to the dialysis center before I realized I didn't have my O2. I couldn't believe it. I wear it 23/7 and sometimes I don't even feel it in my nose. I'm so used to it. I thought I had it. When I made it to dialysis they had to hook me up right away to their O2 and I was ok but then going home I waited until the car came to pick me up before going outside and then came right home giving my self a treatment all the way.
At home I went over all my birthday cards and reread them. It was so nice to read them. Now I have to go out and get some fish food for the new killer fish that I have. I wonder if I could feed him some bread crumbs? (just to hold him off)
TV really sucks. I'm so sick of hearing the same old, same old all the time.

Saturday, November 19, 2005

I'm really taking my time this morning; getting ready for the party. It's about 12 noon and they already started to arrive downstairs. I'm not going down until at least 1:00PM. The party is until 4 or 5 and if I go to early I won't make it for the entire party.
I've been going on ebay buying things and I can't even remember what I bid on until I won or lost. I think I won too many. I don't even remember bidding for some of them. I think I have to watch myself. I actually think I bid against myself once. I got some christmas presents for my sisters.My birthday party was so much fun. Everyone came and we all had the best time. It was the first time we’ve all been together for about a year. I was so happy. They all cooked something and it was all excellent. I couldn’t eat there but I’ll eat tonight when I’m alone. I have a little trouble eating when I’m excited and I was very excited to see everyone and get hugs from all my nieces and nephews. The boys loved my scooter. They drove it all over and gave the little kids rides. This went on for hours. They even took it out in the parking lot and I’m sure a few of the seniors in the neighborhood didn’t like it but I didn’t care.
I got so many gifts; clothing, picture for my walls, paper shredder, had, gloves, scarves, cooking pans, lots of cake mixes ( I love baking cakes), lots of very funny cards, sweatshirt, A fish bowl with fighter fish ( a really fancy bowl). And lots of $. It was a big surprise.
Everyone was very surprised when I sent one of my nephews out to my car and he gave everyone a box that has the plants you take home and grow. Those big White Paper Plants. I think they really liked them. I sure loved giving them.
After the party they all came up and looked at my apartment. I was ready for sleep and they didn’t mind saying good night and giving me a big hug. It was a fun day.
I have to rest. I have dialysis at 6:00AM tomorrow morning (Sunday). So I’m going to bed early. My sister dropped off some food and I’ll eat something before going to bed.

Friday, November 18, 2005

Awesome day! I started the day with dialysis and I’m sure that doesn’t sound like fun but I’m used to it and it keeps me alive. I went in today at 126 lb and I left weighing 118. That’s 8 pounds of fluid that was taken out of me. But I feel good and that’s all that matters. After that I met Denise and we both celebrated our birthdays at a sushi lunch. The fish was fresh and very good. After that I got a full massage from Dana and she really worked on my neck and shoulders. I feel great. I was able to have O2 during the massage. I’m home now and I have to take it easy. Tomorrow I’m having about thirty members of my family over for a party. My sisters are throwing it for me and we’re going to have lots of fun. We always do. They don’t know but I bought each family a present. I can’t wait to give it to them.
Claire NJ emailed me and said happy birthday. That was very sweet of her. Claire is a member of the COPD Chat room that I go to. It’s a great place for people with COPD. I learned so much from the members. Especially the ones that have had COPD for many years. A few of the members are getting Lung Transplants and that’s what I’m interested in.
My sister just dropped me off a Jersey Mike’s Sub. It looks might good but I’ll have to take about 4 phosphorous binders.

Thursday, November 17, 2005

Last night I had a dream that I gave my cell phone away but I forgot to get the chip that had stored all my telephone numbers. I had to ask the person to give me back my phone so that I can copy the telephone numbers of my friends.
It’s November 17th and the birthday of my niece Denise.
I’m meeting Caroline today at the Point Pleasant Beach Train station at 12 noon and we’re going to lunch at Clark’s Landing. Then I’ll take her back to the train station so she can make it back to NYC for her play tonight. She’s playing Gertrud in “Hamlet” and she’s getting some very nice reviews. She doesn’t read them until after the play has ended.
Getting older is a funny thing. I noticed that with seniors that the older you get the more you talk about the most intimate and private things in your life. I guess you’re always talking with doctors so you forget that not everyone is your doctor. You over hear seniors telling their friends about their bowel movements, sleeping problems, passing gas, burping, sleep apnea, acid reflex and other very personal things. After a while you’re so used to talking about it that you forget that others are around. Maybe it’s a good sign that I don’t talk about it. I’m not a senior yet. When I do start talking about it, then I’ll know I am. But to tell you the truth, I’m getting close and I am a senior with family and good friends. And I’m only 56. The guy that sits across from me in dialysis is 80 and he said he wishes he was 56 again. That was nice to hear.
I’m going to take my time and get ready for my date with Lady Lagerfelt.

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

I suggest that everyone looks it the social services that are available in their communities and take advantage of what's there before it's all eaten up by the immigrants. There are lots of things available to seniors that they don't even know about. Many seniors are eligible for food stamps, extra money, someone to help clean the house, transportation, glasses and lots of other things. They should find a social worker in their community and check it out. After all they or their kids have paid all their lives for it and it's time to get the benefits of paying into them. I know many seniors that feel funny doing this. They think it's welfare, but it's now. It's why you saved that money when you were young.
Also, if you have parents that are old you should see an attorney that deals with Eldercare. They will be able to show you how to arrange their estate so you won't loose all the money if they get sick. It's worth looking into.

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

I just got back from the grocery store. I can't buy a lot because I can't carry a lot. I bought a gallon of water, Tile cleaner, 100% maple syrup and a box of Tastykake Cupcakes. I always wonder what the checker thinks as you go through and pay. I wanted to buy paper towels but I couldn't find them and I got tired of looking so I just left with this stuff. I'll go back or send Santos tomorrow.
My friend Scott R. had a good suggestion. He said to type my blog on a word document and then copy it to my blog. So I’m trying this as a way to use my spell check.
Last night I had another strange dream. I was chasing a white dog and it ran down and was sitting by the water. I went over to get him and I fell in the water and went all the way to the bottom. I was thinking that I had my cell phone in my pocket and I didn’t have a chance to take anything out of my pockets. I went all the way to the bottom and then came all the way to the top and popped right out of the water and I wasn’t wet. I don’t know what happened to the white dog. I woke up but at first I didn’t know where I was. They I realized It was a dream. I thought when a person turned 56 he wouldn’t have these strange dreams anymore.
I purchased something today on ebay. I love buying things on ebay. One person’s junk is another man’s treasure.

Monday, November 14, 2005

I'm so fortunate to have such a great family and friends. I was happy to receive so many calls and emails on my birthday. Starting at 5:30AM with Caroline Lagerfelt. Who else would call me at 5:30. I loved hearing from her. I was up and just about to be hooked up to the dialysis machine. Then my sisters, my niece, my nephews and friends. I got emails from around the world, Los Angeles, Sweden and Naples, Italy. A couple friends in Sweden, Obie and Scott R. The day isn't over yet. My sister is bringing me dinner at 5:00PM and Santos is cleaning my house; making everything look neat.
The spell check on this blog really sucks. I'm sorry if words are misspelled, it's not my fault. There is more than one way to spell a word. The right way and the Catholic way. I went to Catholic school and they didn't really teach us spelling. I'm always on time but I just can't spell. That's the reason I was so happy when someone invented "spellcheck". That's the greatest program. I wish they had it in language too. As we speak, that is.
I'm enjoying my birthday today, well, I'm enjoying it as much as anyone can that starts the day with 3 inch needles in his arms. I actually didn't feel them, I'm just looking for a little sympathy. I feel pretty good but I'm not 100%. I'm still on these antibiotics and I have a few more days of them. I have a cough and I just want to feel better. I went into dialysis today and weighed 124 lb and I came out weighing 117. That means they took 7 LB off me so that makes me very tired until I get a little of that weight back again. I just woke up and I'll sleep again for a few more hours. My therapist would be proud of me today. The taxi that picks me up and brings me home was very dirty and had cigarette butts in it. It says "NO SMOKING" but the drivers smoke and they don't think you can smell it. I called the owner when I got home and told him that I'm not riding in another car that smells like smoke. That made me feel pretty good. Let's see if that works. The worst thing that happens is they start hating me.
Last night I had a very strange dream. Lynn Concrieve, a friend that I haven't seen in at least 10 years, and I was running through a swamp and there were all kinds of alligators all over. She kept wanting to put her foot in holes and there were the heads of alligators in them. I kept pulling her away from the alligators. Then I woke up. That was so odd because Lynn was a friend all the way from highschool but I have only since her once or twice since then. She was very very funny and we had so much fun in highschool just laughing. I think I hit her in the head in biology class with my dead perch.
It's 4AM and I'm ready for dialysis.
Oh, It's my birthday... I just remembered.

Sunday, November 13, 2005

It's only 6:50PM and I'm getting ready for bed. I have to get up at 4:00AM for dialysis so I like to get a good night's sleep. I watched a DVD about Alaska today. It was my way of taking a vacation. I also had pizza with my nephew. He picked it up and brought it to me. Pizza with root beer soda. It was great.
Caroline opens tonight in "Hamlet". I know she'll be great. I look forward to reading the reviews. She never looks at reviews until after the play is closed.
When you can't drink to much is the time you want something to drink. I want to drink up about a gallon of water but I can't. I'll suck on some ice and that will have to do. Right before I go into dialysis tomorrow morning at around 5:30AM I drink a big glass of water and I love it. I know in a few minutes they will be pulling the fluid out of my blood. I didn't drink too much over the weekend so I'm not bad right now.
Going to bed..... Tomorrow is my birthday.........

Saturday, November 12, 2005

I called 911 this morning because my blood pressure dropped down below 79/50 and I got very light headed. I thought I was going to pass out. I did all I can do just to get back to my chair to lay back. I took my blood pressure and that's how I new there was something wrong. I called 911 and asked them what I should do. I didn't want to waste 911s time by calling them if I didn't need them. I also got this strange sharp pain in my left leg. I got it twice. They came and I checked out ok. They told me to call them if my BP dropped down again.
I stayed home all day. Carleen brought me a ham dinner with my favorite black&white cookies. TV really sucks. I hate it. Everytime I put it on it was so bad. I was just watching one of those make-over shows. They take a fat man, shave him and dress him in black and they are all excited. It's so stupid. And I still have a pet peeve that all the detective shows have the most beautiful woman dectectives. Every time I've been in a police station all I saw was donut eating overweight police officers. I don't see beautiful blonds, brunettes and redheads walking around taking their hair out of their eyes.

Friday, November 11, 2005

It's cold today and going to start to get colder on the east coast. I'm not looking forward to it. Plus they keep it very cold in dialysis because of the machine. It's also cold because they take my blood out and that makes me cold. I bought a lottery ticket today. The pot is around 220 million dollars. When I win then Caroline and I will take a trip around the world. I can't wait. That should happen tonight. I took the cash value so I'll just get about 110 million after taxes. I didn't feel like walking today. I was very much out of breath for some reason. So I took my scooter to the car, then parked the scooter and took the car to the store, drove back and got the scooter and then scootered to my apartment. It was so much easier then walking all around carrying things. My sister made me flounder for lunch. I just have to heat it and I'm going to do that now. I'm starving.

Thursday, November 10, 2005

The beautiful Betsy Russell called me today. She's very much in love and I'm happy to hear that. Her older son, Duke, is being recognized as one of the top young surfers with major endorsements. Sounds like he's right on tract to keeping the Van Patton name in the sports world. Since leaving Vincent Van Patton, Betsy is now dating and very serious with a new beau. I know he's a very successful producer. I'll find out his exact name, I don't want to write it until I'm sure. We laughed about all the collectible stuff on eBay when you search "Betsy Russell" and all the things when you google her name. Try it and you'll see for yourself.
I'm still a little under the weather. I'm on antibiotics and cough syrup. My voice is very deep. I'm trying to decide if I'm going to go back to the doctor today? I don't know, maybe I should just continue to take my antibiotics. I'll see someone tomorrow morning in dialysis.
It's raining out. I ate Shredded Wheat w/ Cheerios. I always like to mix my cereals. If I had Frosted Flakes I would have mixed them in too. Cereal companies should do that with a couple favorites that go together.
I threw away so many videos that were dubs of dubs of dubs. I had so many copies of masters that I really didn't need them. I would never look at them. I'm only interested in looking at the lastest master.
Time to take a little nap. I'll be back later and write more.
..... I'm back. The war has to end soon. This is getting very bad. Everyday young men are dying and we don't understand why. I can't understand why we haven't captured Bin Laden? They are always saying we captured an important terrorist but I don't even believe them anymore. I think it's all lying so that Bush can do something else. I think the next elections will change everything and the winner will be the person that will get us out of war and get the soldiers home. They are now saying that there will be a major terrorist attack on an American hotel or some location within 90 days. The "they" are a group of terror experts that have been accurate about the last two terror attacks in London and Amman.

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

I think I have Restless Leg syndrome. I haven't had that yet and it sounds interesting. I saw it on TV. I didn't get to sleep until way after midnight last night. My legs were restless. Restless legs can lead to heart attack because it's a sign of poor blood circulation. There are so many new diseases and so many new prescriptions you can get free. You can watch TV and they advertise all these new diseases. Latenight TV is a hypochondriacs paradise What did we do before knowing about them. I think people up late must have all these new diseases. Hey, do I have that disease or do I have those symtoms. I don't even know what the disease is but the symtoms sound like something I have. They might just show a man sailing in a boat and they advertise a new drug. What is the drug for? Catching fish? . I sure can't figure it out but they tell you to ask your doctor if you could use it? Hey, doctor could I use Viox? Could I get a free sample of Ambient? The commercials tell you what to ask your doctor for. There are commercials for erectal dysfunction, rectum dysfuction, virginal dysfunction, urinary infection, bowel dysfunction, colitus, urinary bowel colitus syndrom and every other combination that you can imagine and there's a medication to take for them. I have to go, I have a little bump on the side of my head and I want to go see what it could be.

Monday, November 07, 2005

My birthday is coming soon and it's a big one. I'm going to be 56 but when I talk with someone that is 56 I sure don't feel like I'm as old as them. Can you imagine, 56 is almost 60. I'm going to be 60? My God. I'm the youngest in my family. I'm the baby of the family and I'm going to be 60 in four years. I guess I should just work on making it through 56 before I worry about being 60. The funny thing is, I don't feel like I'm 56. I don't even feel like I'm 50, or 40 for that matter. I know I'm not the healthiest person around but I don't feel old. I don't know what old is suppose to feel like. I remember when I was very young I thought old was someone that was falling apart. Walking bent over, couldn't see, couldn't hear. Today, old is different. What ever happened to the old Nana types. You don't see them anymore. My sisters are grandparents but they aren't the type of grandparents that we had. They are active and they don't wear house coats. They don't wear aprons with sugar cubes in their pockets.

Sunday, November 06, 2005

I'm tired! I'm going to bed. I watched a little TV and I have to get up at 4:00AM for dialysis. TV sucks. Now they have a disposable video camera. For $29.00 you get 20 minutes of video then you just throw the camera away. I guess it's good for those last minute weddings. It's funny to watch the different news programs and they all have "exclusives" of the same thing. Or when they are showing you something that says "Live" and you already saw it earlier. Why do people that smoke or eat too much think we care about watching them quite or loose weight. We don't! We did it and so can they. Just do it! And shut up about it or just keep smoking and eating.
On Saturday I went to the doctor's office and I saw Dr. Dedona. She gave me an antibiotic for the bacterial infection that she said I have and she also gave me some cough medicine for my sines. She's a good Dr. And the Dr. That took care of me when I was in the hospital after Dr. Vita went on vacation. I've been taking the medications for a couple days and I'm glad I went in because this is the type of thing that if I was to wait too long then I would wind up in the hospital with a worse upper respiratory infection.
Last night I also dropped over Rosemarie and had calves live / bacon with onions, mashed potatoes and cream corn. It was delicious. My sister made the meal for Carleen, it was her anniversary and she requested that for dinner. Most people hate liver so my sister had to make prime rib for others but I took the liver. I ate lots of renagel with my meal.
I'm going back to bed. I have to get better and this cough syrup makes me sleepy. It's a beautiful Sunday today.

Friday, November 04, 2005

More and more I don't feel like going outside. I really have to push myself. There are so many things outside that I have no control over and I'm getting sick of. It seems that every place I go there are people smoking. Just about every building I go into there are people smoking outside the building. It doesn't matter if it's an office building, a hospital or a restaurant. There other thing I have to deal with is just the smell of second hand smoke in taxis and cars that pick me up. The other day I was driving my own car and I couldn't get away from the fumes of a large truck that was in front of me. Even with my windows closed I could smell the awful fumes that were bellowing out of the truck's exhaust.
This morning I was waiting for a taxi to pick me up at dialysis and a bus that transports some of the people in wheelchairs parked in front of the building and the driver when in side the building and left his bus' engine running. The fumes were coming out exactly where I was standing. Remember I have oxygen because I have severe COPD. I need a lung and I don't need all these things to make it even worse than it is. I only have 16% capacity in my lungs and I need every bit to last me as long as possible. The question is? How do I tell people without sounding like a pain in the ass. It makes me want to just stay home, where I have no smoke and I'm in control of the air that I breath. At home, I'm not coughing all the time. As soon as I get in some of these cars that pick me up, I start coughing. Maybe I need a mask. I just don't know.
Today I talked with two friends that I haven't talked with in a while; Jeff Thomas and John Peterson. Jeff is in Houston and got a new job, John was on his way to some island for a vacation. Made me feel good talking with them.
Today I have a cough. I don't know where it came from. Now I'm taking some medicine for it. I had dialysis. I'm feeling good.
I haven't heard back from Dr. Kerr about my xrays so I'm taking that as good news. I did call the office but there weren't in. I was actually happy about that. I met with Dr. Frabrese, my renal doctor. He put in an order to get that appointment with the Lung / Kidney Transplant doctor. This is all so boring. You know when you don't have working kidneys, you keep wanting to go the bathroom but you can't. There's nothing there. It just doesn't work. It's a pain because I feel like I have to go but then I can't. I just stand there, waiting.

Thursday, November 03, 2005

I get very tired of people telling me they are making Mexican Lasagna, or a Japanese Pizza. Why can't these people make their own dishes without hooking onto an italian dish and ruining it. I've seen Italian Tacos ( a taco shell with meat balls in it). it sucked.
The Red Cross, The United Way and President Bush and Clinton are still on TV asking for money for the people of New Orleans. Millions and millions of dollars have been donated and there are still people homeless and begging for help. Where has all the money gone? Why are people still in need. We need accountability.
Living in a large apartment building has it's advantages and it's disadvantages. Every time I walk through the lobby there are a group of old people down there talking. There are two groups that don't sit together and they talk about each other. There's always one person that complains all the time. The one with the BIG mouth. There's the committees going on and I hate to be involved in any of the committees because all they do is argue. When I moved in here I understood it was an "over 55" living building. But I didn't know there were younger people her under special circumstances. The seniors are must be awful hard to please for the building owners. They complain if it's too cold, too hot, If they smell something funny, if the lobby is dirty, if someone dropped paper on the floor, if someone opens the front door for someone that doesn't live here, if there is a reason to complain they will complain. I say hello to the ones I see and I'm very nice to them. I can't believe that I'm a senior, living in home for seniors. But these people are all 80. The best deal is that the apartments are very nice. They are taken care of and the owners seem to care. They fix things, check all fire detectors, change filters and do regular maintainence without asking. It's like living in an expensive highrise/condo.

Wednesday, November 02, 2005

I watched the funeral of Rosa Parks and I couldn't help but think about how we set people up to be idealized. I'm not talking about Rosa Parks, she is a remarkable woman that deserves the praises. I'm talking about President Clinton and reverend Jesse Jackson. It's odd how we (Americans) can tear someone down in the press. We can learn all the things people do. Like Clinton having sex in the White House and Jesse Jackson committing adultery and having a child that he didn't tell anyone about. How can reverend Jackson be a reverend. Why do we allow these people to be idols for the children of America. I can understand Rosa Parks. I'll write more later. I just wanted to get this started.

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

I went to my costume party and was a big hit. It wasn't your usual party, it was on-line. I was "Naked man" and I kept accidentally bumping into people and having to excuse myself. Oh, don't worry. I had a body stocking on but it was skin tight and showcased every detail of my muscleman body and porno star profile. It was nice because I didn't have to leave home. It's one way to celebrate Halloween but you don't get any candy.
I'm staying positive despite the fact that I'm on dialysis and oxygen. It's been suggested I need a kidney and a lung transplant at the same time. The lung doctor said there's a dot on my lung xray that concerns him and I have something with my left ventricular heart valve, on top of all that my hemorrhoids are killing me. But I'm not letting anything bother me. It's going to be a beautiful day and I'm enjoying it, life is too short to worry about anything. I'm going to make myself a nice breakfast and sit on a pillow.